Ozarks RFD: First it was pocket knives

I heard on the news some schools are banning cell phones.

It figures. First it was pocket knives, and at about the same time deer rifles in pickup gun racks.

What gives? Are school officials completely out of touch with reality?

I guess it makes sense they wouldn’t want a student leaving a rifle in his truck in the school parking lot. That’s an invitation to trouble. Someone might steal it and the school could be sued for not protecting students’ private property.

I don’t know if it has ever happened, but it might, with all those illegal immigrants moving up from Mexico.

What’s worse, that rifle in the gun rack could lead to broken windows or jimmied truck doors, adding insult to injury. I wouldn’t want it to be my rifle, especially if it was in my dad’s new Silverado 4x4.

Who would fix Daddy’s truck if it was damaged while in the school parking lot? It sounds like a good day’s wages for some lawyer.

Now, as for pocket knives, that rule makes no sense at all. But, I can understand it in an airport. If TSA were to allow us country boys to keep our castrating and skinning knives, then they’d have to turn a blind eye to those suspicious-looking Mexicans and Arabs.

But, I wouldn’t think it should be much of concern with school kids. I can’t remember the last time a teenager flashed his Keen Kutter to hijack a school bus to Dairy Queen.

And that brings us to this latest push to ban cell phones. Seems to me if kids would rather spend their time with their phones, rather than their classroom studies, the consequences are on them.

Granted, phones are a distraction in the classroom, but not for long. Soon enough the teachers won’t have to worry about those digital communication junkies. They’ll flunk out and be gone — back home to mom and dad or looking for handouts on the street.

Their choice. At least they’ll be able to brag those tyrannical teachers couldn’t tell them what to do. They’ll be the winners in the cell phone wars — just like “the winner” in Bobby Bare’s song, toothless grin and all.

As for me, I’m past all that stiff neck stuff, now.

I never had to give up my pocket knife in school, I never had a truck or rifle to leave in the parking lot, and I never heard of cell phones.

But I did have to cut my hair, wear a belt and tuck in my shirt tail, whether I wanted to, or not. Those were the rules, and rules are rules.

Copyright 2025, James E. Hamilton; email jhamilton000@centurytel.net.